Martin: The Gleghorn Story

Tonight, with the season well under way, Wimbeldon decided to have a pre-season friendly. That was our first - and by no means last - mistake.
  It was a match that last exactly 71 minutes, a match played on synthetic grass with little black balls of something scattered on it, and a match played with a football owned by Philip Mason.
  Other things happened too.

Also, Tini didn't score.
At all.
Not even once.